Sketchy road trip + adventure = ?

I'm with DJ Mike and in a rental car (a Cadillac Seville at that) on the way to New York City for a little rendevous of sorts. Wow. Maryland House rest stop. I was gonna (attempt / pretend to cruise trade in the bathroom). All I saw was a guy walking his dog in a stretch lycra shirt a la N-Sync (when the first came out). Then comes a real BIG gurl in a tent of a tee-shirt (as she turned and walked away in the other direction, all we saw was a long track of poo stains or something strewn down her inner thigh - EWWW). Right after her, we saw Ma & Pa BIG gurl come towards us to the neighboring car. Ma was in her full glory in house coat a big yellow curlers. WurQ!!!